You are an ocean, you are an ore.

If you are me and I am you,
What is this separation between you and me?

We are the light of God, we are God‛s mirror.
So why do we struggle with ourselves and with one another?

Why does one light escape from another?
Come, release yourself from this ego.
Live in harmony with everyone;
Be friendly with everyone.
If you are by yourself,
You are only one drop, one speck;
Whereas when you bond and unite with everyone,
You are an ocean, you are an ore.
~ Rumi

THE JOY OF DESIRE...paradox of divinity and humanity

It's not wrong to want. 

Spiritual awakening, enlightenment, liberation, is often framed as the total annihilation of human wants, desires, needs.
This is a terrible misunderstanding that keeps so many people stuck, numb, bored, disconnected, at war with their bodies.

You'll be free from desire when you are a corpse.

The Buddha tried annihilating his desires, remember. It didn't work. Eventually he gave up and embraced them instead. This is the Middle Way.

Wants do not disappear in awakening. In fact, no thought or feeling does. It's your relationship with them that radically shifts. 

Now, you recognise yourself as the ever-present vastness in which ALL wants, urges, impulses, thoughts, sensations, feelings, sounds, can come and go; the unending sky in which the weather doesn't need to 'disappear', but can flourish. Come rain, come shine, come desire, come sorrow, come joy, come despair, you remain, as the wide open space that holds it all.

No more numbing wants, or denying them in order to appear 'spiritual'; yet no need to rush towards their fulfilment either, always running towards the future, fleeing a sense of lack. There is a deeper fulfilment, rooted in your own presence, that notices wants, bows to them, listens to them, yet is not their slave.

You see, you are the paradox of divinity and humanity, absolute and relative, formless and form:
You want nothing but can deeply honour your wants.
You need nothing but can learn to bow to your needs, see their sacredness.
You desire nothing but can hold desire, play with it, see its beauty, its intelligence; and know that all desire, deep down, is really the desire for Self.

As a little one, it was healthy to want food, to need love, to desire objects, to explore your own boundaries, test your limits, feel thwarted, then vindicated, then frustrated, then relieved, taste your own power, learn to honour your powerlessness, touch your freedom and your physical limitations. 

Desirelessness is a numb state, a state where you are afraid of desire and become its slave; it is not freedom.

And wanting the end of wanting is the biggest want of all.

You deserve love, little one. You deserve all the spiritual riches of life. You are precious, and all the mountains and trees and oceans and stars bow to you as you walk, for they recognise themselves in you, share your power, feel your heart.

Jeff Foster

Remember By Christina Rossetti

,

She Walks in Beauty By Lord Byron

She walks in beauty, like the night

   Of cloudless climes and starry skies;

And all that’s best of dark and bright

   Meet in her aspect and her eyes;

Thus mellowed to that tender light

   Which heaven to gaudy day denies.

One shade the more, one ray the less,

   Had half impaired the nameless grace

Which waves in every raven tress,

   Or softly lightens o’er her face;

Where thoughts serenely sweet express,

   How pure, how dear their dwelling-place.

And on that cheek, and o’er that brow,

   So soft, so calm, yet eloquent,

The smiles that win, the tints that glow,

   But tell of days in goodness spent,

A mind at peace with all below,

   A heart whose love is innocent!

"soul meets soul on lovers’ lips~ PB Shelley" I do think men need to be kissed like this as well ... either way, just enjoy the moment with all your presence

I’m a romantic in it’s richest most organic sense. I have studied it’s imagery in my dreams and lived my life by it’s writings. I haven’t lived long enough to tell tales of seven lover’s past or to whisper the secrets of how to spellbind your beau.
But what I do know is that nothing is more sacred, more powerful to a woman than the perfect kiss. 
Not just any kiss. But to be kissed the way a woman should be, needs to be kissed.
And when that happens, we are yours.
This is not a tutorial, it is not a step by step guide.
This is a poetic code of how to enter into a spiritual space that has been practiced for centuries. To connect with a woman with a kiss, in the way it was always meant to be practiced.
This is romance at it’s best. A love affair with the tongue.
If you can master these ancient codes of ultimate sensual connection, you will have her thinking about your shared moment together for years to come.
1. Hold her like she’s everything.
Your hands are everything, they are your antennas and she can feel your pulse from the touch of
your fingers. Cup her delicate face in your paws, brush her cheek with your fingers, hold her
steady in your grasp. This is your world now, protect that sacred and shared space with your
mighty hands. They hold both of your worlds now.
2. Dance with her aura.
Don’t go straight in just yet. Hold her for a moment and look into the eyes of her soul. She will
take you to heaven and show you where to go from there. Let your body align itself to her
rhythm and play with her unique spirit dance. Caress her with your fingers, nose, cheek and
lips. Let her know you adore her every feature and honor them as much as you will honor her
tongue.
3. Meet her mouth with grace.
Introduce your lips to hers softly. Let her feel the shape and suppleness of your pout against her
own. Let her stay here for a moment, locking onto your skin. See if you can feel her vibrations
pulsating delicately out out her lips and onto yours. Linger here, massaging each other with
softened bites until your tongues are primed to move.
4. Make love to her tongue.
The dance your tongue makes with hers will tell her everything.
Are you listening to her?
Are you dancing to the same dance?
Are you taking her on a journey to heaven with your subtle and delicate twists and turns?
There is no “right” way to move here, as long as you are in tune with her. The feel of your tongue is a miracle to her. You are entering into her and she into you for potentially the first time.
Taste her.
Massage her.
Suck in her nectar and pour into her your strength.
Let her take you in, and feel as she reaches back for more.
5. Don’t stop.
The passion, if true, will only intensify. So keep moving, keep going. Let the fire that moves
your tongue move your hands, your fingers, your hips, your thighs and your mind. Let your
limbs and their finer features hurricane around her until there is nothing else left in this world
except you both. Locked. Energies united and massaging one another in waves. Heaving and delicious. Nothing else will exist, only you.
Your kiss. It is everything.


Tara Minshull (www.elephantjournal.com) 

Osho : On Love

"A mature person has the integrity to be alone. And when a mature person gives love, he gives without any strings attached to it: he simply gives. And when a mature person gives love, he feels grateful that you have accepted his love, not vice versa. He does not expect you to be thankful for it - no, not at all, he does not even need your thanks. He thanks you for accepting his love.
And when two mature persons are in love, one of the greatest paradoxes of life happens, one of the most beautiful phenomena: they are together and yet tremendously alone, they are together so much so that they are almost one. But their oneness does not destroy their individuality; in fact, it enhances it: they become more individual. Two mature persons in love help each other to become more free. There is no politics involved, no diplomacy, no effort to dominate. How can you dominate the person you love? Just think over it.
Domination is a sort of hatred, anger, enmity. How can you even think of dominating a person you love? You would love to see the person totally free, independent; you will give him more individuality. That's why I call it the greatest paradox: they are together so much so that they are almost one, but still in that oneness they are individuals. Their individualities are not effaced; they have become more enhanced. The other has enriched them as far as their freedom is concerned.
Immature people falling in love destroy each other's freedom, create a bondage, make a prison. Mature persons in love help each other to be free; they help each other to destroy all sorts of bondages. And when love flows with freedom there is beauty. When love flows with dependence there is ugliness.
Remember, freedom is a higher value than love. That's why, in India, the ultimate we call "moksha". Moksha means freedom. Freedom is a higher value than love. So if love is destroying freedom, it is not of worth. Love can be dropped, freedom has to be saved; freedom is a higher value. And without freedom you can never be happy, that is not possible. Freedom is the intrinsic desire of each man, each woman - utter freedom, absolute freedom.
So anything that becomes destructive to freedom, one starts hating it. Don't you hate the man you love? Don't you hate the woman you love? You hate; it is a necessary evil, you have to tolerate it. Because you cannot be alone you have to manage to be with somebody, and you have to adjust to the other's demands. You have to tolerate, you have to bear them.
Love, to be really love, has to be being-love, gift-love. Being-love means a state of love. When you have arrived home, when you have known who you are, then a love arises in your being. Then the fragrance spreads and you can give it to others.
How can you give something which you don't have?
To give it, the first basic requirement is to have it."

SING, WORLD, SING!

Break me open, Life
Shatter my remaining defences against You

You placed magnificence at the heart of my despair
You sowed volcanic strength into my vulnerability
Even my doubt vibrated with courage.

"Leave the familiar
With no hope of return"?
Of course!
I am not afraid, I was never afraid!
I once walked a familiar path of self-construction
I now walk a path of grace and destruction
Of weeping at birdsong and telling the truth
I will never turn back!

One day, in my house :)

Gift by Rabindranath Tagore (A favourite poem)

O my love, what gift of mine
Shall I give you this dawn?
A morning song?
But morning does not last long—
The heat of the sun
Wilts like a flower
And songs that tire
Are done.

O friend, when you come to my gate.
At dusk
What is it you ask?
What shall I bring you?
A light?

A lamp from a secret corner of my silent house?
But will you want to take it with you
Down the crowded street?
Alas,
The wind will blow it out.

Whatever gifts are in my power to give you,
Be they flowers,
Be they gems for your neck
How can they please you
If in time they must surely wither,
Crack,
Lose lustre?
All that my hands can place in yours
Will slip through your fingers
And fall forgotten to the dust
To turn into dust.

Rather,
When you have leisure,
Wander idly through my garden in spring
And let an unknown, hidden flower’s scent startle you
Into sudden wondering—
Let that displaced moment
Be my gift.
Or if, as you peer your way down a shady avenue,
Suddenly, spilled
From the thick gathered tresses of evening
A single shivering fleck of sunset-light stops you,
Turns your daydreams to gold,
Let that light be an innocent
Gift.

Truest treasure is fleeting;
It sparkles for a moment, then goes.
It does not tell its name; its tune
Stops us in our tracks, its dance disappears
At the toss of an anklet
I know no way to it—
No hand, nor word can reach it.
Friend, whatever you take of it,
On your own,
Without asking, without knowing, let that
Be yours.
Anything I can give you is trifling—
Be it a flower, or a song.

Walk Alone : Tagore

If no one answers your call
make a stride and walk alone

When everyone is closed and shut
Open your mind and speak alone.

Walk Alone, Walk Alone, Walk Alone

If they turn away and desert
and the wild path obstacles exerts

trample the thorns no matter the hurt
And Alone along blood-lined track traverse.

Walk Alone, Walk Alone, Walk Alone

If no one holds up the light
and a fierce storm troubles the night,

with the thunder flame of pain ignite
your heart, alone, and let it burn bright

Walk Alone, Walk Alone, Walk Alone...!

~ Rabindranath Tagore

Sometimes in doing nothing everything is undone, and love is revealed to be the only true medicine...

When you sit with a friend in pain, when their world no longer makes sense; when confusion rages and no rest is to be found.

Just for a moment, will you resist the temptation to make things better, to reassure them, to provide answers, even to heal them?

Will you offer your stillness, your listening, your presence, and the warmth of your immediacy?

Will you hold them in your heart, with the same tenderness of a mother holding her little one?
Will you embrace them where they are, without needing them to change or transform according to your own needs and schedule?
Will you stay close, holding your own impatience and discomfort near? Will you look into their eyes and see yourself?
Will you stay in the inferno of healing with them, trusting in disintegration, knowing that you are only witnessing the falling away of an old dream?
Sometimes in doing nothing everything is undone, and love is revealed to be the only true medicine."

Reflections

Buddha was walking into the city market one day and near the city entrance an old bitter man was sitting on a box glaring at Buddha, who carried a bright smile on his face. At the sight of him this old man started cursing Buddha up and down, left right and center, telling him how pretentious he was, how much better he thought he was and how he did nothing worthy of the air he breathed in this world. But Buddha simply smiled and kept on walking to the market to get what he needed.
The Next day Buddha returned to the market and once again that old man was there, this time his cursing intensified, screaming and yelling at Buddha as he walked by, cursing his mother, cursing his father and everyone else in his life.
This went on for the rest of the week and finally as the Buddha was leaving the market the man came up to him, as his curiosity had simply gotten the best of him.
“Buddha, every day you come here smiling and every day I curse your name, I curse your family and everything you believe in” the old man says ” but every day you enter this city with a smile knowing that I await you with my harsh tongue, and everyday you leave through the same entrance with that same smile. I know by speaking to you now that you are not deaf, why do you keep on smiling while I do nothing but scream the worst things I can think of to your face?”
Buddha, with the same smile still on his face looks at the old man and asks “If I were to bring you a gift tomorrow morning all wrapped up in a beautiful box would you accept it?” to which the old man replies “Absolutely not, I would take nothing from the likes of you!”. The Buddha replies “Well if I were to offer you this gift and you were to refuse then who would this gift belong to?”. “It would still belong to you of course” answers the old man. “And so the same goes with your anger, when I choose not to accept your gift of anger , does it not then remain your own?”
As a mirror reflects an object, as a still lake reflects the sky: take care that what you speak or act is for good. For goodness will always cast back goodness and harm will always cast back harm...

You can only give away what you already have inside yourself.

True giving happens when you are overflowing from the inside, and cannot help but share. When there is so much love within you that it has to flow to others or you would burst open. There is no thinking involved, no willpower in such sharing. It just flows out. If you have to force yourself to be kind, to love, to feel compassion, you've missed the first step of filling in your own self with these emotions.

My heart is on fire~ Rumi

My heart is on fire
In my madness I roam the desert

The flames of my passion
devour the wind and the sky

My cries of longing
My wails of sorrow
Are tormenting my soul
You wait patiently
Looking into my intoxicated eyes
You accept my passion
with the serenity of Love
You are the Master of Existence
One day I shall be a Lover like You...
~ Rumi

Plead guilty, beautiful stranger, plead guilty.

It is all your fault.

Completely...

Absolutely...

Let me explain why. 

I had been visiting that place for many years, regularly.

I would always be busy doing my own thing.

Loiter here and there, happy and content...

Then, that day, when there were thousands of people

milling around and I was just one of a crowd,

I felt the weight of a stare, I looked up...

Straight at you, even though you were at a distance.

You were looking at me,  your expression was surprised 

yet you looked as if you knew me, were happy to see me.

I was livid with you for noticing me.

Because what I felt in that instant, was going to be with

me for the rest of my life and even beyond.

In that one look, I was yours. My heart, mind, body and soul

belonged to you, because I recognized that they

always had, from eons, from the

beginning of the beginning... we had always been one.

You had absolute power over me! How terrifying it is to realize that someone

has this kind of power over you. Yet, how heart achingly lovely

to also know that this power would never ever be abused.

If you had not said a word, just walked up to me

and held out your hand, I would have clasped it and let you lead me

wherever you wanted to go. I would have been content to walk with you FOREVER.

And that is also the reason why I have never looked at you again.

Directly. 

I visit that place as before as do you.

I am aware of your presence more than even the reason why I am there.

I know you feel me too. Our expressions are straight faced.

I see you from the corner of my eyes, walking, smiling, talking to people.

Sometimes, I see your hands and they move me. They feel strong, powerful yet so gentle as if they would hold a new born babe like a soft cloud. They feel like as if anything held in them would remain safe and be alive forever. I want to rest my heart in those hands.

And so now you know why it is all your fault? Because you started it, you noticed me before I did. And now I am done for! 

And I don't even know your name!

Plead guilty, beautiful stranger, plead guilty.

And then I surrender to it....

Tonight I ache.

With every beat, every breath, every blink.

But I’m not sad.

Not hurting.

Not broken.

Oh no, on the contrary.

I’m full of love.

The kind of love that overwhelms you, threatens to break your heart with its magnitude. Pushes into your field in waves, gently coming and going like the tide. Though perhaps not so gently.

Surely I am too small for this love. Too fragile. Too brittle.

Surely if I let it all in I must combust.

Break into thousands of tiny pieces never to be recognised again.

Surely it must overwhelm me. Strip me of my identity. Have its way with me; leave me naked, broken and shivering in its wake.

My heart hurts with love. So much love it frightens me.

I can feel my fear pulsing with the beat of my heart.

Screaming out to me that I don’t deserve such love. That if I let it in it will just abandon me. Toy with and then tire of me, leaving me all alone.

I close my eyes and take a breath. Another. Another.

And then I surrender to it. To this Love.

Allow it to wash over and through me. Through my fear.

To take my heart. My body. My soul.

To break me wide open and have all of me.

And in that moment I understand.

Love is the answer no matter the question.

Love is the essence of our universe, the building block of our existence, the true nature of our beings.

It is there always, fiercely gentle, patiently waiting for us to accept its unconditional presence in our lives.

Love is remaining right where it is, holding us in its embrace until we are brave enough to invite it in.

Love has no prerequisites, no expectations, no stipulations.

Love just loves us no matter what.

Love will not abandon us, it is us who abandons it.

Thoughts about Soul Connections and Manifesting Dreams...

When your heart is calm, your mind is steady, and you have sought first the Partner Within, which is your Soul, then you will have reached a point where the need to be with another is a bitter-sweet ache. Don't try and suppress this yearning. It is perfectly natural and spontaneous. Express it to yourself, admit it to God/ Source/ The Universe...

This yearning is an integral part of your journey. You feel alive, you feel complete, you feel life force surge within you and you want to share it.

Just don't let it consume you. Put yourself in a place where you can "see" your longing... not BE it. This is to say be FINE with wherever you are

It has taken a great deal out of you to reach a point of awareness & clarity. You have suffered the pains of a huge awakening, to be one with your soul. Like a seed you were buried alive and you have broken free and sprung forth from the Earth to claim your place in the Sun.

What you seek is not someone to "complete" you but one to share your completeness with. There are no missing pieces of you that the other will bring and make you a better version of You.

No, there, now, will be three beautiful entities : You, Him/ Her and the WE that you create together.

No games will be played, societal conditioning can go take a walk, it will just BE : beautiful energy... love... simple everyday magic & miracles... holding hands, warm hugs, languid kisses, meaningful silences... Just LOVE..

Sounds blissful and magical!!!

BUT...just do not have an IDEAL because people live with an ideal Soul mate in their minds, and never get to really experience a relationship with anyone, because when they meet a person that might be a potential partner, they compare this person to the ideal in their head. The ideal in the head is not a real person, it is an ideal that will not be manifested. When you want to have a soul connection with a partner, you have to be willing to work with what the Universe offers you. 

In so many ways, manifesting your dreams will involve letting go of your dreams. Confusing, I know... read on...

When we have too many expectations, we block the flow in our lives as we are too busy rejecting things as they are not meeting our expectations... this becomes a vicious cycle of negativity and resistance. Life truly only flows when you are in the vibe of positivity and acceptance. Letting go of your dreams means letting go of YOUR IDEA of how it should be and be open to what the Universe wants to give you. To learn to play with potentials that come your way. Well, how do we get what we want then? Simple, just KNOW what you want... strip down to your very essence, shed your ego, shed the drama, break yourself open again and again till only YOU remain, standing naked in blinding light of knowing who you are, what are your boundaries, what you will and will not allow, what makes your heart sing, what your nature is...

Consider this simple example: For an apple tree dreaming of making apples, you can imagine that the Universe will grant its wish. Now the apple tree is completely aware of it's nature... so, it does not say I want to grow mangoes. That would be silly. It wants to, longs to grow apples, red, ripe, crisp apples because that is what the tree IS. So, apples will grow... some seasons not as many as the tree would have liked and other times, a bumper harvest. Be like the tree, long and ask for what you are, not what you are not.

Expressive intimacy

Put aside the instruction manuals. Your partner’s body is a unique landscape to be explored.

Explore it—with care and attention. With your hands, your mouth, your eyes.

Remove their garments. Slowly. Or urgently. It doesn’t matter, as long as you undress them.

Look into their eyes. Gaze unflinchingly, unashamedly.

Breathe fully and deeply. Synchronize your breathing. Inhale their exhalation. Allow them to inhale yours.

Ask questions. Answer honestly.

Tell them what you’d like in this moment. Or show them where and how to touch you.

Be real. Be vulnerable.

Kiss them. On the mouth, the back of their neck, their belly button. Light kisses. Deep and probing kisses. Kiss them until you both  tremble and cry out for carnal fusion.

Take responsibility for your own pleasure. Give gentle but clear feedback—through moans, words and movement.

Stroke their back, their belly.  Notice what makes them quiver.

Was that a sharp intake of breath? Oh, do that again!

Did I mention moaning? Moan. Softly or loudly—just make some noise.

Go down on them. Tease them with your tongue— create a hunger for a deeper thrusting.

But don’t go chasing orgasms.

Focus instead on mutual pleasure. When pleasure is all that’s sought and orgasms are experienced as a bonus, they often come more easily. More readily. Just, more.

Relax. Enjoy the delicious sensation of lying skin-to-skin with another beautiful soul. Languish lazily, draped in each other’s limbs, dipping in and out of love-making. Indulge in the moment. In one another.

Be yourself and allow your partner to be who they are too.

Be present—

in your own body and with the body next to you. Present and connected, love one another with all of your body and soul.

Hilda Carroll 

DOES YOUR MIND WANDER?

I am in the mood ...
I am in the mood for
expression, for emotion,
and for a light conversation.

I am in the mood ...
I am in the mood for learning
about you, for walking with you
and for BEING with you.

I am in the mood ...
I am in the mood for
Love and peace and
a better understanding
of what we all are demanding.

I am in the mood ...
I am in the mood to be
like a river, flowing free
and to be embraced by
the arms of the sea.

and now...
I am the mood for a cup of tea.


Lopamudra (1991)

Just found this poem I had written ages back.

The Song of Sadness

Sorrow prepares you for joy. It violently sweeps everything out of your house, so that new joy can find space to enter. It shakes the yellow leaves from the bough of your heart, so that fresh, green leaves can grow in their place. It pulls up the rotten roots, so that new roots hidden beneath have room to grow. Whatever sorrow shakes from your heart, far better things will take their place.

It is you who has to believe in this eternal truth, with all your heart. Your belief and faith will give it power to manifest completely in your life.

So, whenever you are sad, sing a song!!

EGO -D

Are you alone today?
Do you seek a way...
to know, to find
somewhere in your mind
answers to what transpired...

Are you not inspired
by the strange turns of fate
which unlock the gate
of your closed heart
and so depart... your ego,
your pride and leave behind
only a shred of former glory...

All else swallowed by
LOVE... a powerful emotion
a never-ending devotion to
HIM!


Lopamudra (2001/2)

CONVICTION

A lone star shining on ...
spreading it's feeble light ...
in the all-pervading darkness
of this terrible night ...

A tiny flicker of life moves
in the deepest corners
of this heart, long frozen
to life ... itself.

A small smile ... lurks...
beyond... far beyond in
the empty depth of
these soulless eyes ...

And I carry on, sustained,
protected against the harsh
realities of this world that
threaten to break me,
they bend me, BUT
I spring back, strong still...

For I believe in me...
and I always will.

Lopamudra (2002)

Excerpt from The Prophet by Khalil Gibran

Let there be spaces in your togetherness, and let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another but make not a bond of love: Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls. Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup. Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf. Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone, Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music. Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping. For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts. And stand together, yet not too near together: For the pillars of the temple stand apart, And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.

My favourite Urdu couplet

Raat yun dil mein teri, khoyi hui yaad aayi
Jaise viraane mein chupke se bahaar aa jaye
Jaise sahraon mein haule se chale baad-ae-naseem
Jaise bimaar ko be-wajaah quraar aa jaaye

Faiz Ahmed Faiz

रिश्ते

रिश्तों को सीमाओं में नहीं बाँधा करते
उन्हें झूँठी परिभाषाओं में नहीं ढाला करते

उडनें दो इन्हें उन्मुक्त पँछियों की तरह
बहती हुई नदी की तरह
तलाश करनें दो इन्हें अपनी सीमाएं
खुद ही ढूँढ लेंगे उपमाएं

होनें दो वही जो क्षण कहे
सीमा वही हो जो मन कहे

- अनूप भार्गव

I want you!

You need only yourself. Learn to love yourself as much as you can. Be complete. Let the yearning you feel for love be fed by your own S-ELF. And then...


Try and weed out the "I needs" in your life and replace them with "I wants".

Don't say I cannot live without you. 

Say I can live without you, I can be anywhere in the world, but I choose to be here, with you. 

What a beautiful way to tell someone you love them! Want people, choose them, let it be light, let it be joy, let it be a laugh, a smile, a warm touch, a making love that is fun.

Do you see the difference? It's subtle, yet huge. It is a whole paradigm shift. It is the difference between feeling null or feeling full.

Reflect.

Ramblings from 2008

I am alone today and I seek a way
somehow, if possible to stay...
alive...

Grief burdens my shoulders
and tells me to give up
give up all hope that tomorrow will be better
Its an empty promise that will never come true.

But then I see the sun rise every morning, the sparrows chirping while I sip my tea I remember sitting with Atul and doing the same...
surely Life is still flowing... and as long as I live, I know that I need to flow or I would become still water and we know that still waters run deep and stagnate. No, thats not how I want my life to be... I am a gurgling brook gushing over rocks...

For my room in my own house one day :)

A Tear And A Smile~~~ Khalil Gibran

I would not exchange the sorrows of my heart
For the joys of the multitude.
And I would not have the tears that sadness makes
To flow from my every part turn into laughter.

I would that my life remain a tear and a smile.

A tear to purify my heart and give me understanding
Of life's secrets and hidden things.
A smile to draw me nigh to the sons of my kind and
To be a symbol of my glorification of the gods.

A tear to unite me with those of broken heart;
A smile to be a sign of my joy in existence.

I would rather that I died in yearning and longing than that I live Weary and despairing.

I want the hunger for love and beauty to be in the
Depths of my spirit,for I have seen those who are
Satisfied the most wretched of people.
I have heard the sigh of those in yearning and Longing, and it is sweeter than the sweetest melody.

With evening's coming the flower folds her petals
And sleeps, embracingher longing.
At morning's approach she opens her lips to meet
The sun's kiss.

The life of a flower is longing and fulfilment.
A tear and a smile.

The waters of the sea become vapor and rise and come
Together and area cloud.

And the cloud floats above the hills and valleys
Until it meets the gentle breeze, then falls weeping
To the fields and joins with brooks and rivers to Return to the sea, its home.

The life of clouds is a parting and a meeting.
A tear and a smile.

And so does the spirit become separated from
The greater spirit to move in the world of matter
And pass as a cloud over the mountain of sorrow
And the plains of joy to meet the breeze of death
And return whence it came.

To the ocean of Love and Beauty----to God.

Silence is all I can say. ~Mevlana Rumi

A spirit that lives in this world
and does not wear the shirt of love,
such an existence is a deep disgrace.

Be foolishly in love,
because love is all there is.
There is no way into presence
except through a love exchange.

If someone asks, But what is love?
answer, Dissolving the will.
True freedom comes to those
who have escaped the questions
of free will and fate.

Love is an emperor.
The two worlds play across him.
He barely notices their tumbling game.

Love and lover live in eternity.
Other desires are substitutes
for that way of being.
How long do you lay embracing a corpse?
Love rather the soul, which cannot be held.

Anything born in spring dies in the fall,
but love is not seasonal.
With wine pressed from grapes,
expect a hangover.

But this love path has no expectations.
You are uneasy riding the body?
Dismount. Travel lighter.
Wings will be given.

Be clear like a mirror
reflecting nothing.

Be clean of pictures and the worry
that comes with images.

Gaze into what is not ashamed
or afraid of any truth.

Contain all human faces in your own
without any judgment of them.

Be pure emptiness.
What is inside that? you ask.
Silence is all I can say.

~Mevlana Rumi

Moments and milestones…

I am not original in what I feel
Many have said it before
But it is the truth
So, I say it once more…

Happiness is in moments, fleeting.
You have to be aware and steal it
Or life will pull a fast one
And you will be left with nothing
But regret and repenting.

So, dear friend
Look for the moments in life,
Waiting, while you rush after milestones
Those are visible from afar…
The minor ones are there
Wanting you to come and share
The beauty that is in them
Stop for a while… walk off the road
Don’t worry it will always be there
Bury your feet in the grass
Let the breeze mess your hair
Smile at the sunshine making
Golden patterns here and there

A few lines...

Kisine aankho me aanso diye...
Tum paani samajh kar pi jao

Kisine ne gham ke saaye diye...
Tum hothon pe muskaan layo

Kisine ne zakhm-e-nasoor diye...
Tum auro ke liye marham ban jao

Yehi ek jeeni ki raah hai, dost...
Bas yun hi jiye jao


Attempted translation:

If someone fills your eyes with tears, absorb them as if water

If someone gives sorrow, let your face light up with a smile

If someone gives an eternal wound, be sure to soothe others

This is the only way to live, friend; Just keep on living

The Australian PM said:

India Needs A Leader Like This !

Muslims who want to live under Islamic Sharia law were told on Wednesday by Prime Minister John Howard of Australia to get out of Australia , as the government targeted radicals in a bid to head off potential terror attacks.

Howard angered some Australian Muslims by saying he supported spy agencies monitoring the nation's mosques. Quote: "IMMIGRANTS, NOT AUSTRALIANS, MUST ADAPT. Take It Or Leave It. I am tired of this nation worrying about whether we are offending some individual or their culture. Since the terrorist attacks on Bali , we have experienced a surge in patriotism by the majority of Australians."

"This culture has been developed over two centuries of struggles, trials and victories by millions of men and women who have sought freedom"

"We speak mainly ENGLISH, not Spanish, Lebanese, Arabic, Chinese, Japanese, Russian, or any other language. Therefore, if you wish to become part of our society . Learn the language!"

"Most Australians believe in God. This is not some Christian, right wing, political push, but a fact, because Christian men and women, on Christian principles, founded this nation, and this is clearly documented. It is certainly appropriate to display it on the walls of our schools. If God offends you, then I suggest you consider another part of the world as your new home, because God is part of our culture."

"We will accept your beliefs, and will not question why. All we ask is that you accept ours, and live in harmony and peaceful enjoyment with us."

"This is OUR COUNTRY, OUR LAND, and OUR LIFESTYLE, and we will allow you every opportunity to enjoy all this. But once you are done complaining, whining, and griping about Our Flag, Our Pledge, Our Christian beliefs, or Our Way of Life, I highly encourage you take advantage of one other great Australian freedom, 'THE RIGHT TO LEAVE'."

"If you aren't happy here then LEAVE. We didn't force you to come here. You asked to be here. So accept the country YOU accepted."




Maybe if we circulate this amongst ourselves, Indian citizens will find the backbone to start speaking and voicing the same truths. Do you agree ?

Angry, Anguished yet Hopeful II: IT IS NOW

I have been reading blogs and discussion boards flogging Muslims and/ or Pakistanis. And this base reaction scares me. An eye for an eye will leave all blind. Too many innocent lives have been lost... a 2 year old orphaned on his birthday. a father losing two daughter the apples of his eyes, a young major (1977-2008)... 150 or more. Not mere statistics... each a person with his or her own world, now desolate with their loss. We owe them a sensible and reasonable way of thinking. Not more innocents to join them.

I hear the voices baying for blood. I bay for it too but for the blood of those responsible whoever and wherever they may be. I want our anger to be controlled and channlised in a way that the right target is "targetted"... not a religion, a community or country (though the links are obvious... this does not mean we start bombing Pakistan), it means weeding out the scrouge.

I don't know why and from where I have faith that my country will take a mature, well thought out course of action and all my fellow Indians will support that course. Becase if ever India has been pushed in a corner and can be heard screaming "WE HAVE HAD ENOUGH", it is NOW. Let this moment be a unifying one and may NO ONE be able to "play their personal gain games" with this moment to be communal or separate us. WE STAND AS ONE... Hindu, Muslims everyone, hand in hand against terror. We shall not be fooled by anything but the RIGHT thing. Let our leadership know this.

Angry, Anguished yet Hopeful

"Fifty hours of pure terror and disbelief.
Ours hearts, full with rage and grief.
The blood on the road flowed
in our veins, we feel the pain.
We have died with innocents
and the fighters...
We cry with the families
A bond ties us.
Evil has no nation
caste or creed.
Target the deed
Not the breed..."


I am so numb with what has unfolded in my country over the last 50 hours that I can barely string a sentence. But I must, for when I feel is when the truth is revealed. I saw people die, cry, come away alive. I saw men in uniform doing their duty, professionally, efficiently and sensibly. I saw NDTV report the most sensbile and was aghast at the exclusives in other channels! Shocked me, I tell you... scoring brownie points at a time like this! Petty, pathetic and painful.

A bindless bond...

He sat by her side, holding her hand. She smiled at him and said “; don’t be… this is life. People come and go, I am going. And I don’t want you to come with me. You have my love in your heart to keep you strong and move on in life; find a wonderful woman to grow old with. You will, right?’ Her tone was firm yet beseeching. He felt his heart tighten with emotion. Before he knew it, a few tears fell from his eyes. She said”, I hate tears, Pushpa”.

He smiled, in spite of himself. He looked into her eyes. They were luminous, radiant pools of light. It has always been her eyes that captivated him. Whenever she used to look at him, he used to feel as if she was inside his mind and heart; there was nothing hidden from her. How could there be, in the face of such deep love? And he liked the fact that there were no secrets from her, even though many things were always unsaid. He always knew were they said, she would have understood. A thought that enveloped him like a cozy blanket. To be totally understood, just as one is… extremely rare.

She softly said his name and he bent down to listen “, you are my strength. Don’t think I am not afraid of dying, but I am brave because you are here with me. Love gives you courage to face all, even one’s own death. Hain naa”? He nodded yes, unable to speak.

“, and also courage to live in spite of a loved one’s death, meri jaan, because love itself never dies, yaad rakhna. Rakhoge naa? Apni zindagi bharpoor jeena and if someone holds out a hand, reach out, if it doesn’t work out; be sure another hand will come your way; you just have to have faith in love. Main to chali jaungi, tumhari chinta sukoon se aakhri saans bhi nahin lene deti’.

He steeled himself and said”, Pata e, pehli picture kaunsi dekhunga uske saath… Amar Prem”. Her smile was the ray of the sun, when she heard that. Her hand tightened around his… she said aur nahin to kya.

And the sun set at 9:45 am.

THE SHADOW...

It was one of those get togethers at the GOC’s house and I was draping my turquoise sari. Atul came to help me with the pleats which he always did…I smiled. He looked so handsome in his bandhgala. It was navy blue, which caught his complexion really well. He looked every inch the officer and the gentleman he was. My heart swelled with pride and my love for him shone in my eyes. He preened, touching his mouche, combing away imaginary unruly strands of hair, dusting his shoulders. I nudged him and we both laughed, in perfect harmony with each other.

We entered the party lawns and walked towards our host Gen. K , who was holding court with some officers and their wives. A grinned “The cat is away (referring to the Gen’s wife)… I smiled. It was well known in the Army circle that Mrs. K was a tough old bird. Suddenly, A called out “Hey! Bhatta, you bugger! Come here”. I turned to see a young officer, probably a captain with his wife walking up to us. Oh! She was so pretty, in her heavy Benarasi saree, gold jewellery and her wedding choora.

She looked shy, ill at ease. My heart warmed towards her, knowing what she must be feeling. The Army atmosphere can be overwhelming for a young girl, the protocol, the sit down dinners, I had been through it, and so I knew the anxiety one feels as a new bride. You want to make a good impression especially for your husband’s sake. And there is enough gossip floating around about how the ladies can tear one to shreds, if one doesn’t know the salad fork from the dinner one at those stuffy formal sit-downs!

“Maam, this is S, my wife”, said Bhatta, proudly. I spoke to her warmly, asking her about her family etc. She talked to me a bit shyly at first, but soon was chattering away, telling me about her exams and their honeymoon in Goa (a favourite destination for young officers as the Army has a nice setup in Panjim)… After a while, we moved away, had to circulate… but I kept looking out for S, smiling whenever I spotted her, she reminded me of myself so much when I had been a new bride. A asked me “L, what is it? Why the smile?” I said “Just that I look at her and see myself then and now as a Col’s wife, sure of what is expected of me. Just thinking she will be sure too”. He nodded, saying “He is a bright chap, will rise, got an alpha on his YO’s.” We looked towards them and I felt the hair on my arms rise!

I saw something behind S, a hazy figure of a woman. I don’t know why, my heart filled with sense of foreboding. I felt a cold finger run up my spine. Something terrible was going to happen! I asked A “What is that?” He couldn’t see anything. After a minute or so, though it seemed like forever, the shadow disappeared. My throat was dry. “Oh! God… they are so young! Let nothing happened to them” a silent prayer escaped my lips.
I was quiet for the rest of the evening and as we drove back home, I asked A “Is the brigade moving out for anything?” He said “Yes, darling. You know its winter; we will be going for the regular exercise in the desert area. Why?” I said nothing.

In the next few weeks, I met S too, once or twice at a Ladies Meet and a coffee morning. But it was at a welfare event that I saw the shadow again just behind her. I shook my head, it was still there. My heart tightened.

That evening, I waited for A’s call. When the phone rang, I snatched it and asked him “How is Capt. Bhattacharya? Where is he?” There was a note of surprise in A’s voice as he answered, “He is with his unit. They are 100 kms away from my location. Why?” Then I told him of what I had seen and my fears. He laughed gently, cracked a few jokes and in his usual way, put my fears to rest. I was feeling light when I hung up.

The next morning, the phone rang around 6 am. I reached out for it and as I listened to the voice telling me what had happened, I realized that the shadow had been for me, not S.

Solitaire

What's Your Goddess Identity?

My Result: Muse

Known for your creative powers, you Muses are the poets and musicians of life, the patrons of the fine arts. It's funny, though — even with your inspirational prowess, you're probably not the type to boast about your guitar-strumming skills, or your latest published book of verse.

While it's great when people flock to you for ideas, there probably is a part of you that prefers to blend in sometimes — whether dressing in muted shades or staking out a one-on-one conversation at parties and social events. But try as you might not to hog the spotlight, others can't help but notice you. Must be hard to be such a goddess!

Despite any lingering modesty, you might be surprised at how much your mere presence can help improve the lives of those around you by infusing them with ideas and good thoughts. With that kind of healing energy, your inspirational ways have the potential to change the world, Muse. Whether you're scribbling sonnets, boogying with your friends, or drawing your own constellations — you're tapped in. So keep your eyes wide open to the possibilities and let that inspiration flow!

What are you?
http://web.tickle.com/jumpto?test=goddessidentityogt&c=50652

The Phoenix...

She folded her knees and sat up, rocking to and fro, as if trying to comfort her own self with a steady motion. She felt dead; as if someone had sucked her life force from within and left just a shell, a husk with no grain. Her grief, her hurt was too deep for tears.

She blankly stared into space as if trying to divine an answer from the air itself. I could hear her silent screams "Why", why"... she repeated the same word. I knew. She wanted to make sense of it all; sense of something which just is. There is no pattern to it. It manifests itself into each person's life in a different way and each person has to fight for his or her own survival. I have given them everything, but it’s dormant. They have to activate their own selves.

And while I wept tears of blood for her, I stood by her side, saying nothing, just sending thought wave after thought wave of love towards her heart, hoping that through the darkness, even a small ray would reach her, telling her that life is still worth living and the stranger she meets on the bus deserves a smile. Just because the last stranger wiped the smile of her face with a backhand swipe, she must still trust; as in that lies her salvation. To smile, to love, to live, to rejoice... in spite of ALL that may happened.

She was sobbing now, her body shaking and trembling, her head bent down on her knees, immersed in her agony. My heart went out to her and I said ", Child! Do not weep anymore. The oceans in my universe have run dry as they fall from your eyes. I beseech you to try and see me, see that I love you, and see that my arms are open wide for you. But till such time that you are where you are, you must still smile, spread love and joy, and never get bitter because that is certain poison to kill me"...
She looked up, as if straight into my eyes, and I could see her spirit fighting her pain, and as a tiny smile glinted in her eyes, I knew that once again, the phoenix had risen. I sent her a bright colorful ray on which danced a thousand dreams and went on.

"Hope" ... a poem by Emily Dickinson

“Hope” is the thing with feathers—
That perches in the soul—
And sings the tune without the words—
And never stops—at all—


And sweetest—in the Gale—is heard—
And sore must be the storm—
That could abash the little Bird—
That kept so many warm—


I’ve heard it in the chillest land—
And on the strangest Sea—
Yet, never, in Extremity,
It asked a crumb—of Me.