HOW TO TOUCH A WOMAN~~

It's not WHERE a man touches his woman as much as HOW he touches her that makes her feel safe.

It's not HOW he touches her as WHY he's touching her that causes her to open.

It's not WHY he's touching her as much as WHO he has chosen to be and how he has chosen to live in the moments, hours, days and weeks leading up to that touch.

It's not his TOUCH that matters as much as the energy of his INTENT.

And when all of these are aligned it's not even a touch needed to make her shudder, but a word, a breath or even just his gaze.

This is not a dream, a myth or an impossibly romantic fantasy - it is the potential inherent in every man. It requires that he dare to own and live the magnificence of his potential, to show up in the world with the courage to fulfill his responsibilities, keep his word, overcome challenges and abandon his excuses.

There is no METHOD that conquers the world, it's the CHOICE to fulfill one's potential. And there is no TECHNIQUE that makes a woman lose all her inhibitions, it's the ENERGY of his intention.

LOVE'S ADVENTURE

We long for love as much as we fear receiving it.

We yearn to be seen as much as we bolt at the possibility of being seen.

We hunger for the deep embrace of presence, tender eyes that gaze upon us with understanding and empathy, as much as we try to escape that very holding. It's too intimate. Too risky. Too exposing.

Nowhere to hide. To be seen is to be loved. To be seen is to die. Love is danger. Or so we have been taught.

A battle rages in us. The unloved one longing to hide, and the one who longs for the thrill and risk of living. Contraction and expansion. Breathing, in and out.

Unconsciously, we are attracted to or repelled by those who treat us, speak to us, hold us the way our parents did or did not. We are drawn to those who can heal us, and sometimes drawn to those who cannot, or worse. We think we are falling in love with a person, and sometimes we are just falling in love with our own image of them, which has nothing to do with the 'other' at all.

We love and we lose our images of love. We rise and we fall. Our hearts soar and our hearts break into a million pieces. We seek security and find insecurity and we find security in that. We seek freedom and find the prison of our own programming and lose hope and then regain it.

Sometimes it takes courage to leave a relationship. Sometimes it takes courage to stay. Sometimes it takes courage to do nothing, today. Sometimes it takes courage to admit how much pain you are in.

Sometimes it takes courage to admit how happy you are.

Sometimes you take a step without knowing why, and everything only becomes clear in hindsight.

You can't get it wrong anyway.

We lose ourselves and we find ourselves. We give more than we can take, exhausting ourselves in the name of "love". Or we run as fast as we can, exhausting ourselves in our flight from "love".

"Will somebody see me. Listen. Hold me. Let me break..."

And the drama of love plays out. And as the play goes on we learn more about ourselves. We begin to see our blind spots. Our unconscious patterns come into the light of awareness. We realise our assumptions. Our childhood fantasies start to crumble. Pain that we never wanted to feel, we suddenly feel. Grief. Anger. Feelings of rejection, abandonment. We want to run, go back into the old addictions, the old comfort, and for whatever reason, we don't. We get curious. We start looking and stop thinking so much.

We begin to relate to ourselves. Treat ourselves like the greatest lovers that we are. The most fascinating and beloved creatures.

With each day, we begin meeting ourselves more deeply. Discovering who we really are. What we feel, and what we don't. What we want and what we don't. Learning to say 'yes' when we mean yes and 'no' when we mean no and if that hurts someone, giving them back their responsibility to heal. Learning that love is not all butterflies and roses and positive feelings. It is work, too. It is mess. It is pain and the courage to breathe through that pain into joy and expansiveness. Love asks us to become more and more real, more and more human, more and more conscious, less and less perfect. More self-aware and willing to feel. And to feel more. And to feel more. And more. And to let our hearts break sometimes. To not know, sometimes. To be bored, sometimes. To be blissed-out, sometimes. To be full of life. To sometimes not know what the next step is. And to take it, or not.

Love is not a feeling, a state, or an experience. It's not a destination.

It's this extraordinary Light that shines from within.

It's this radiant Knowing that never leaves.

It's the Joy of being alive.

We can know it together. We can know it alone.

We can remind each other of it. We can forget, too.

We can trigger each other and help each other get curious about those triggers. We can do that work, or not.

We can meet in love's fire. Walk together, or not.

Share our hearts. Step back. Step towards. Or stay where we are.

Learn to love the dance of it, the spontaneity, the adventure, the mystery, the immediacy and the intimacy of it and the running too.

Learn to unlearn what we knew and embrace the unknowing as new knowing.

And get more and more content with the unresolveability of it all.

More and more happy with the unhappy one, certain about the uncertainty, so secure in the insecurity.

More and more blissed-out at our lack of bliss.

More and more curious about what's here Now.

Less and less solid, more and more playful.

Less a seeker of love, more a giver of it, and a finder, and a Presence that invites others into the same wild joy.

This is Love's Adventure.

Dear woman... don't dim your shine!

Dear woman, sometimes you'll be too much woman. Too smart. Too beautiful. Too strong. Too much of something. That can make weak men feel like even less of a man. Which in turn can start making you feel like less of a woman. The biggest mistake you could make, though, is to remove jewels from your crown to make it easier for a man to carry. When this happens, I need you to understand, you do not need a smaller crown. You need a man with bigger hands.

What is True Love? I’m no seer, no enlightened soul. All I know is that, to me, these things define true love. Here’s to hoping we all allow ourselves the chance to experience it.~

True Love Is Magical, Not Magic
Sure, true love comes with moments you feel you can defy gravity. You and that special person can simply be near each other and everything is perfect. Holding hands in a storm. Smiling each time they cross your mind. Looking forward to the next time you are in each other’s arms. True love is magical, but it’s not magic. Life continually moves on. Just as bad times guarantee good will follow, good times can also be followed by bad. True love does not keep this from happening. It’s not a magic spell that ensures happiness ever after. If held onto though, it will weather all storms with you. When bad times come, true love hasn’t let you down or lost it’s magic. It’s still there, riding the rollercoaster with you.

 True Love Is Faith
To be open to true love is to truly be vulnerable. It is allowing yourself that quiet ease that comes with knowing your partner honors and cares for you. It is realizing everything you do has someone’s heart attached. We can worry about the next person that comes along. We can be on guard looking for the one that comes to steal that person away. For men, this is almost ingrained into our psyche. We must defend our love and always be on guard. For those who have been hurt, it comes even harder. Step back and see this; you never lost someone because you weren’t running off everyone else, although you could definitely lose someone by refusing to have faith in them. To grow from love to true love, let go and know that if it is true love, every day they choose you.

True Love Is Reciprocal
True love comes in pairs. The same love and affection shown to you should be what you give back. It is definitely possible to love someone more than they love you. Undoubtedly, someone has loved you more than you love them. True love is both given and received. It is a mutual admiration and bind that both of you have agreed to let flourish. It may not happen overnight. It may not develop in both parties at the same time, but when true love is present, it is gloriously mutual.
  
True Love Is Accepting
True love accepts flaws and weaknesses. You know everything about that person and welcome it all. They have seen all your pieces and want to be a part of your life. Friends, family, those that mean the most to each of you are all welcome in this equation. Everyone they hold close has been a part of making them the person you adore. Sure you can love someone without loving those important to them, but true love accepts. True love welcomes any healthy relationship that has made you who you are today. Your children could just as well be theirs. Their friends matter just as much as yours.

                                  AND...

True Love Is A Choice
Love and passion. Both can come out of nowhere. You can find yourself wrapped up in someone that seems like they where made specifically for you. What comes next, is a choice. Both people choose to devote themselves to the other. Both people choose to be there through good and bad. The fact is, there are many people you could fall in love with. The plain truth is, people can choose to go their separate ways and still lead a fulfilling and happy life. True love is not being incapable of going on without someone, it’s choosing to go on with them, regardless. We go through lives living, experiencing and building. True love is looking back, holding your lovers hand and appreciating you chose to do all that together.

Remind me ~Jeremy Goldberg (I love this!)

Remind me to always lie with you, but never to you, and that hurt only hurts while it lasts. Remind me to hold hands but never hold back.
Remind me of love, remind me of heart, and remind me that life will not tear me apart today, but if it tries and when it does, remind me that I’m good enough to be enough for you.
Remind me that the only way to make it last is to put us first, and remind me that the past is a prelude and pain is a choice, that I’ll get knocked down but I can get up quick, and yes, I’ll get destroyed but I can rebuild again.
When you see me flailing in rough seas, coughing up lungfuls of dark waves, and I’m thinking I’m sinking because my arms are numb and I can’t feel my legs, remind me with a hushed assurance and a knowing grin, “You’ll drown slower if your chin’s up, friend.”
Remind me to have faith.
Remind me why I love you.
Remind me that the stargaze stares we share and the galaxies we wish to explore are inside, not above, that the paths we long to travel are internal, not foreign, and remind me when my dreams seem lost like faraway lands in disrepair, that you’ll hold my hand and always care.
Remind me that it’s me you think about when you wish for happily ever after.
Remind me that not all aches are bad, that black nights still shine light and even in rainstorms or when hail comes and the sky is filled with emptiness we run from, the sun is always out somewhere.
Remind me that I am filled with light.
Remind me why your eyes do such funny things to mine and how, sometimes, time stops in the shadow of your smile.
Remind me that storm clouds are just water up high in the sky, that water is needed, that water gives life, and though it may arrive in drops of sweat or tears of strife, remind me that I can heal.

Remind me to keep you close but to never go too far, and remind me that even if we feel like a lifetime stopped and stuck in its tracks like a frozen statue of our distant past, even if it feels like pointless paralysis or a beginner’s magic trick, even when we resemble an empty well all out of wishes, remind me it will be okay and already is.

Remind me that you are strong, and remind me so am I.
Remind me that you aren’t scared when, can’t run from, won’t hide, and don’t mind my pain when it’s all I know and feel and fear.
Remind me that we’ll never know how it ends until it does, and even then, it doesn’t because what we have and who we are isn’t something we can just pack up and leave behind, like some kind of shooting star in some cold and fleeting night.
Remind me how I love getting lost in you.
Remind me that you are an adventure worth taking and never forgetting.
Remind me it starts now, today, for always in all ways, and remind me to remind you of this, all of it, always in all ways.

A FORMLESS LOVE, FORMING

Love is greater than us. We do not generate it with words and deeds, or even intentions, but we are continually embraced by it, held in its vastness, no matter what we do, or do not.
We are married, we divorce; we are friends, we are lovers; we break up, we break together; we are born, we die; the field endures.
Nobody has ever given us love; that is the great illusion. We have simply remembered the field in each other's presence, sometimes, recognised eternity in the midst of the everyday, then credited another. Love never came from outside of us; we simply touched our own presence, fell into the love that we are, and cannot not be.
And nobody ever took love away from us; we simply forgot the field, and 'blamed' the other, and looked for love again, feeling its absence, lost in a narrative of 'lost love'. Yet love was there, even in its apparent absence; it was present, even in the loss. It cannot be broken; a wave cannot crush the Ocean.
Do not seek love, do not look for the light, but be it, offer it; the joy of loving another is infinitely greater than the joy of fearfully clinging to another's love, for deep down you know it is only an illusion that what you have always longed for could ever have come from outside of you. You are the One; you have always been the One.
The search ends exactly where it began - in presence.

Awareness : Sadness... embrace it!

In every moment of sadness, another layer of outdated cellular memories leaves your energy field. As each layer is released through spontaneous expressions of doubt, despair, and disappointment, the world is equally cleansed and released from the spell of unconsciousness. This may help you understand how there is nothing to fear when sadness is present. If anything, knowing the energetic purpose behind such a misunderstood emotion reminds you to slow down and relax your body, so you may see how an experience of sadness has absolutely nothing to do with the circumstances and outcomes that bring it to the surface.
Sadness is your highest transformation being recognized in progress. No matter how lonely it may seem or how devastating it can feel, sadness acts as the unsuspecting sign that a new reality has dawned within you. As this is accepted, the consuming nature of sadness transforms into the peaceful resolve of self-realization. This helps to dispel any myth about the location of awakening that many believe exists somewhere beyond the grip of sadness. Instead, Awakening is the natural recognition of your essential nature that unfolds with ease, once the healing power of sadness has been survived.
This may also help you see how, in its’ purest form, sadness is not the absence of happiness. Sadness is actually the clean-up crew of the Universe. One breakdown at a time, it sweeps every distraction out of your energy field, so the happiness that is always here can be revealed.

Imraan’s Shayari (Poetry) from Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara

Ik baat honton tak hai jo aayi nahin
Bas ankhon say hai jhaankti
Tumse kabhi, mujhse kabhi
Kuch lafz hain woh maangti
Jinko pehanke honton tak aa jaaye woh
…Aawaaz ki baahon mein baahein daalke ithlaye woh
Lekin jo yeh ik baat hai
Ahsas hi ahsas hai
Khushboo si hai jaise hawa mein tairti
Khushboo jo be-aawaaz hai
Jiska pata tumko bhi hai
Jiski khabar mujhko bhi hai
Duniya se bhi chupta nahin
Yeh jaane kaisa raaz hai


 There is a matter that has almost come to my lips
This is evident in my eyes
Sometimes from you, sometimes from me
They ask for words
To take their shape and come to my lips
And to be embraced by my voice
But this matter
Is a feeling…only a feeling
Floating in air like fragrance
Fragrance becomes its voice
That you know of
That i know of
It’s not hidden from the world
Don’t know what kind of secret is this

My love is not of this world, she thought.

She was complicated in her simplicity, she knew this.

She was the type of girl that smelled of sandalwood and open fields after a long Summer rain; intoxicating, fresh and simple to take in with a depth that seeped into the very soul. She didn’t need to be saved only to be stood by and loved deeply while she saved herself.

Her heart bled poetry whose tomes were unread none having the eyes to see the words written there. Yet there was a humor in her that danced freely and oh how she loved to laugh.

She was at once a mystical journey into the heart of the Earth and the calm found in the fading light of sunset. She had to be swam so deeply to be understood at all and so few had bothered to even dip in a toe.

Her mystery could never remain silent, this she knew. It came out.
The truth always had a way of doing that. She could never silence the magic that flowed through her or the wild passions that coursed in her veins.

Better to be left for what she was than to be loved for a mask, she thought with a heavy heart.

She wondered sometimes as she stared into the dancing trees if there was anyone on this planet that felt this depth, this longing. Perhaps they were on another planet.
Maybe that’s why she spent so much time searching the stars, looking for a sign of the light shining somewhere for her. Maybe she was looking for a home that she had not yet found.

To be this weird, this wild, with this much heart and this depth; the joker, the goddess, the mystic and the lover.

It pained her sometimes.

Who could dance with this passionate fire, ride the waves of this endless sea, laugh to the depths of their being and choose to embrace all of it openly knowing it was only the beginning.

He would smell of home, she decided, and his skin would feel as familiar as her own.
She didn’t need a mask of perfection only his authenticity with truth etched upon his brow and the glow of real love shining in his eyes.

 She didn’t want some unrealistic ideal only the beating of his heart against hers and a smile etched on their lips, as they traced the ancient love stories on each others' skin.

He would drink her in like it was the most natural thing he had ever done, needing to satisfy an ancient thirst. Feeling the depth of the pull towards her he would open his arms to her mystery, not turn and run.

Without taking a step he would fall deep into the place that he was always meant to be by the side of the type of girl that smelled of sandalwood and open fields after a long Summer rain; intoxicating, fresh air that would fill his lungs all in one easy breathe with a depth that eased him and soothed him to the depths of his soul.

Their love story would be of eternity and yet pulsating in each moment. He would provide her relief and she would give him rest. Together, they would love, laugh and live and then no desire, no dream would remain... together they would BE home.

How Not to Be Offended

There is an ancient and well-kept secret to happiness which the Great Ones have known for centuries. They rarely talk about it, but they use it all the time, and it is fundamental to good mental health. This secret is called The Fine Art of Not Being Offended.  In order to truly be a master of this art, one must be able to see that every statement, action and reaction of another human being is the sum result of their total life experience to date. In other words, the majority of people in our world say and do what they do from their own set of fears, conclusions, defenses and attempts to survive. Most of it, even when aimed directly at us, has nothing to do with us. Usually, it has more to do with all the other times, and in particular the first few times, that this person experienced a similar situation, usually when they were young.

 Yes, this is psychodynamic. But let’s face it, we live in a world where psychodynamics are what make the world go around. An individual who wishes to live successfully in the world as a spiritual person really needs to understand that psychology is as spiritual as prayer. In fact, the word psychology literally means the study of the soul.
All of that said, almost nothing is personal. Even with our closest loved ones, our beloved partners, our children and our friends. We are all swimming in the projections and filters of each other’s life experiences and often we are just the stand-ins, the chess pieces of life to which our loved ones have their own built-in reactions. This is not to dehumanize life or take away the intimacy from our relationships, but mainly for us to know that almost every time we get offended, we are actually just in a misunderstanding. A true embodiment of this idea actually allows for more intimacy and less suffering throughout all of our relationships. When we know that we are just the one who happens to be standing in the right place at the right psychodynamic time for someone to say or do what they are doing—we don’t have to take life personally. If it weren’t us, it would likely be someone else.
This frees us to be a little more detached from the reactions of people around us. How often do we react to a statement of another by being offended rather than seeing that the other might actually be hurting? In fact, every time we get offended, it is actually an opportunity to extend kindness to one who may be suffering—even if they themselves do not appear that way on the surface. All anger, all acting out, all harshness, all criticism, is in truth a form of suffering. When we provide no Velcro for it to stick, something changes in the world. We do not even have to say a thing. In fact, it is usually better not to say a thing. People who are suffering on the inside, but not showing it on the outside, are usually not keen on someone pointing out to them that they are suffering. We do not have to be our loved one’s therapist. We need only understand the situation and move on. In the least, we ourselves experience less suffering and at best, we have a chance to make the world a better place.


This is also not to be confused with allowing ourselves to be hurt, neglected or taken advantage of. True compassion does not allow harm to ourselves either. But when we know that nothing is personal, a magical thing happens. Many of the seeming abusers of the world start to leave our lives. Once we are conscious, so-called abuse can only happen if we believe what the other is saying. When we know nothing is personal, we also do not end up feeling abused. We can say, “Thank you for sharing,” and move on. We are not hooked by what another does or says, since we know it is not about us. When we know that our inherent worth is not determined by what another says, does or believes, we can take the world a little less seriously. And if necessary, we can just walk away without creating more misery for ourselves or having to convince the other person that we are good and worthy people.
The great challenge of our world is to live a life of contentment, regardless of what other people do, say, think or believe. The fine art of not being offended is one of the many skills for being a practical mystic. Though it may take a lifetime of practice, it is truly one of the best kept secrets for living a happy life.

Man is the most elevated of creatures,
Woman the most sublime of ideals.
God made for man a throne;
for woman an altar.
The throne exalts,
the altar sanctifies.

Man is the brain,
Woman is the heart.
The brain creates light, the heart Love.
Light engenders, Love resurrects.

Because of reason Man is strong,
because of tears Woman is invincible.
Reason is convincing,
tears moving.

Man is capable of all heroism,
Woman of all martyrdom.
Heroism ennobles,
martyrdom sublimates.

Man has supremacy,
Woman, preference.
Supremacy is strength,
preference is the right.

Man is a genius,
Woman, an angel.
Genius is immeasurable,
the angel undefinable.

The aspiration of man is supreme glory,
The aspiration of woman is extreme virtue.
Glory creates all that is great;
virtue, all that is divine.

Man is a code,
Woman a gospel.
A code corrects,
the gospel perfects.

Man thinks,
Woman dreams.
To think is to have a worm in the brain,
to dream is to have a halo on the brow.

Man is an ocean,
Woman a lake.
The ocean has the adorning pearl,
the lake, dazzling poetry.

Man is the flying eagle,
Woman, the singing nightingale.
To fly is to conquer space.
To sing is to conquer the Soul.

Man is a temple,
Woman a shrine.
Before the temple we discover ourselves,
before the shrine we kneel.

In Short Words, Man is Found Where Earth Finishes,
Woman Where Heaven Begins.

~Victor Hugo

Yes, I am single!

Yes, I’m single. No, I’m not lying.
It doesn’t matter if the question is coming from family, my friend’s husbands or random strangers—it’s an inquiry that suggests that because of the woman I am, I should have been taken off the market long ago.
But, the thing is, I’m not looking to be taken off the market, just so I have someone’s arm to hold onto as I cross the street.
I’ve joked around and told people that not everyone can handle my flavor of awesome. I’ve said that I am too busy with work and my children to date. There have been times I’ve whimsically replied that whenever it’s meant to happen it will and cynical moments where I said well maybe I am meant to be single forever.
In truth, I’m single because I have lost the ability to settle.
I don’t just want company—I want to be wowed, and in all honesty I’m not wowed that easily.
The funny thing is, it’s not about what kind of car a man drives, nor is it found in his possessions, that he brags about, as supposed evidence of his character and worth.
No, what I am looking for can’t be found in any material things.
It’s found in the eyes of a man and in his heart.
The way he approaches the world and how his life is evidence of what he stands for. I’ve realized that I’m not after just any man—I’m only in pursuit of someone who burns as passionately as I do.
The fact is, I don’t really want a boyfriend.
I don’t need someone to play house with and pass the time until we eventually realize we want different things. I don’t need to learn any more lessons from dating different versions of the same man, nor do I need someone to reflect all of my daddy issues or self-worth back to me.
These lessons I’ve learned have not been overnight. This in depth and sometimes scary self-work has been done sitting by myself, learning that I am enough just the way I am.
I’ve got this. I’m not looking for a bargain basement kind of love.
I won’t be sifting through discount love in an attempt to have something, because I would much rather wait it out, do me, and be ready when someone of my caliber and energy level comes around.
I’m honestly single because I am a lot to handle—with colours that defy the logical and a taste that lingers upon the heart. It’s okay that I’m not everyone’s cup of tea—but what I am will be the right fit for someone who understands the complexities of my contradictions.
The question, “How can you be single?” implies that those asked are supposed to be taken, but maybe it’s the people who actually have their act together who remain single the longest.
Relationships aren’t just for pleasure but also for self-growth. Sometimes we need other’s help to teach us the lessons we are too blind to see. But other times the only person to explore our issues with is ourselves.
Because regardless of who it is, or how enlightened they may seem—we’ve all got issues. How they manifest themselves in our lives depends on what stage of awareness and healing we are in.
For a long time, when someone asked me why I was still single, it made me question my relationship status because I couldn’t just team up and date random people like so many seem satisfied with. It was as if something was wrong with me because I didn’t feel a strong desire to fill my social calendar with those wanting to take me to dinner or concerts.
But then I realized, it was because I had fallen in love with myself and my life—as is.
I enjoy my own company, and that of friends and family so much that the only reason I would accept an invitation by a prospective man is if I felt he could add something to my already full life.
I’m not living my life day to day, hoping for the best. No, I am here building my own empire in the sky, and the fact is once a woman has decided to build her own castle she isn’t looking for someone else to do it for her.
Does that mean I think I am superwoman, and that I can do everything on my own? No, not at all. But it does mean that I know the qualities I am looking for, not in a lover or a boyfriend—but in a partner. I want someone whose dreams are just as full as mine, who aspires to a life they can attain with hard work and dedication.
I’m waiting for someone who can match my strength. He will be strong enough so that I don’t always have to be strong. I’m not looking for someone to be like me, but to complement me.
Perhaps the biggest reason that I am still single is that I know exactly what I want.
I am looking for presence in a man. He’ll know how I should be spoken to and how to ignite a fire inside my belly. The fact that I don’t yet have this is okay with me because I do have faith that I will one day.
So, why am I still single?
Because I have decided not to accept less than what I deserve. I have learned that my worth doesn’t lay in the hands of a man. I wake up each day absolutely in love with my life.
Until the day comes when a man comes into my life and enhances what is already here, I will remain single because I’ve found myself. And that is more than half the battle of finding another.

I am not the first person you loved.
You are not the first person I looked at
with a mouthful of forevers. We
have both known loss like the sharp edges
of a knife. We have both lived with lips
more scar tissue than skin. Our love came
unannounced in the middle of the night.
Our love came when we’d given up
on asking love to come. I think
that has to be part
of its miracle.
This is how we heal.
I will kiss you like forgiveness. You
will hold me like I’m hope. Our arms
will bandage and we will press promises
between us like flowers in a book.
I will write sonnets to the salt of sweat
on your skin. I will write novels to the scar
of your nose. I will write a dictionary
of all the words I have used trying
to describe the way it feels to have finally,
finally found you.
And I will not be afraid
of your scars.
I know sometimes
it’s still hard to let me see you
in all your cracked perfection,
but please know:
whether it’s the days you burn
more brilliant than the sun
or the nights you collapse into my lap
your body broken into a thousand questions,
you are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
I will love you when you are a still day.
I will love you when you are a hurricane.~

A LETTER TO MAGNIFICENT MEN~Christabel Zamor (Inspired by the work of David Deida)

My dear beautiful man,

What I relish from you more than anything is presence. I hunger for you to have the capacity to maintain deep, unwavering eye contact, undistracted by anything in the background.

I crave your deep, resonant voice, and the slow methodical speed of your well thought out words. I yearn for you to breathe each breath with me and guide me to deepen my presence through example.

I am eager for you to stand strong, tall and powerful without figeting or getting restless. I love it when your face is relaxed enough to take me in with or without smiling, but always with deep breaths and a steady gaze.

I love it when your head is held high, your spine is tall, your body looks strong and powerful. I adore it when you can hold me in a tender embrace long enough for me to melt.

I ache for your stability so I can be wild, expressive, and emotional. I want to be able to let go and go crazy with desire, passion, anger or sadness and see you still here and unwavering, just being like an eternal mountain range~ grounded and dependable. I long to feel your ability to stay through discomfort.

I love and adore your power because it is great and ferocious, but only when it is fuelled by protective love instead of anger or the desire to control. I yearn to feel your devotion instead of any agenda to fix, solve, or match my energy.

I want you to be a man so I can be fully what it is to be a woman. I love the strong, distinct flavour of male energy and I want to taste it in you through your passionate dedication to show up.

I need you to desire and cherish my radiance above your own. I need to feel that my beauty brings you into your body and gives meaning to your life. While I love that you feel emotions and I want to know about them, I hope overall you are the force of stability so I don’t need to constantly carry the mantle of strength… that diminishes my feminine light and hurts my spirit.

I love it when the flow of masculine and feminine ebbs back and forth between us both. It feels nice when you can show your strength in softness and I can flow my femininity through action… this feels delicious when we play it together.

What I crave above all is the polarity in whatever dance we explore so we are magnetically drawn together.

Overall, I need you to know that I adore you! When you stand tall in your greatest power, I become the most tender, flowing and open. I want nothing more then to unleash and soften with you. I want nothing more than to trust you fully and give myself totally to you.

Every Day You Play

Every day you play with the light of the universe.
Subtle visitor, you arrive in the flower and the water.
You are more than this white head that I hold tightly
as a cluster of fruit, every day, between my hands.
You are like nobody since I love you.
Let me spread you out among yellow garlands.
Who writes your name in letters of smoke among the stars of the south?
Oh let me remember you as you were before you existed.
Suddenly the wind howls and bangs at my shut window.
The sky is a net crammed with shadowy fish.
Here all the winds let go sooner or later, all of them.
The rain takes off her clothes.
The birds go by, fleeing.
The wind. The wind.
I can contend only against the power of men.
The storm whirls dark leaves
and turns loose all the boats that were moored last night to the sky.
You are here. Oh, you do not run away.
You will answer me to the last cry.
Cling to me as though you were frightened.
Even so, at one time a strange shadow ran through your eyes.
Now, now too, little one, you bring me honeysuckle,
and even your breasts smell of it.
While the sad wind goes slaughtering butterflies
I love you, and my happiness bites the plum of your mouth.
How you must have suffered getting accustomed to me,
my savage, solitary soul, my name that sends them all running.
So many times we have seen the morning star burn, kissing our eyes,
and over our heads the gray light unwind in turning fans.
My words rained over you, stroking you.
A long time I have loved the sunned mother-of-pearl of your body.
I go so far as to think that you own the universe.
I will bring you happy flowers from the mountains, bluebells,
dark hazels, and rustic baskets of kisses.
I want
to do with you what spring does with the cherry trees.
Pablo Neruda

THE JOY OF WAITING Jeff Foster (www.lifewithoutacentre.com)

When you were young, you loved to dream and let go of dreams. Either way, you dwelled in the Now. When you got older, you started to take your dreams and goals way too seriously, and your happiness became bound up with the future, and the destination became more important than the journey.
Dream about what you want, of course. Have a vision for the future. But learn to let your dreams go, too, let them float off into the river of life, and bring your attention back to the present moment. Don't use a dream as an excuse to disconnect from where you are. Where you are is way too precious...
Learn to love the in-between moments. Learn to love this delicious sense of waiting, yearning, anticipating. Learn to dance and breathe in the space between the wanting and the getting, the dreaming and the resolution of dreams. Learn to love not having what you want right now. The tremendous sense of potential there, the fullness if it, the peace. Realise that 'lack' is only space, resisted. And even an 'incomplete' feeling is so complete, a welcome visitor in the heart. Breathe into the belly, the chest, the head. Infuse the body with light, saturate it with awareness, drench it with love. Feel the fullness of the body. Lacking nothing. Wanting nothing.
Even when you don't have what you want, you are invited to want to be exactly where you are; to fall in love with the place where you stand, to contact the fertile ground as you wait, or forget the waiting and simply savour the moments.
And open your arms in gratitude, ready to receive whatever comes.
Sometimes, even the 'not getting' can be so very beautiful.
Behold, your abundant life.

Love is everything really just everything!

We are taught in this world that love is only a feeling that we can extract through certain relationships and events. This isn’t true. Love is in everything. Each flower that blooms before us, each bird that flies above.

Creation is love and we are all creations of this loving Universe therefore the essence of our being is pure love. Our lives purpose in the simplest form is to love. Love through creation. We are each put on this planet with a gift, whether it be internal or external. That gift is our expression of love.

I can go on to explain that love is many other things. It is putting a smile on someone’s face, it is following your heart’s purpose, it is being vulnerable. Love is setting your ego aside and not being afraid of your hearts sensitivities. Love is following your dreams. Love is the strength to rise above what has tried to hold you down, to remove the blindfold, to open your heart and mind to a new reality. Love is accepting the pain and finding beauty in the sacrifices. Love is looking at everyone around you following the same path and saying fuck that. It is taking a risk to go in a direction where others may judge you. It is admitting that you are not okay and reaching out for help. It is the bravery that pokes its head out from it’s shell to face the world head on.

When you are are living “in love” there is no putting on a front. Love is not being hard on yourself when everything goes to sh*t, it is being gentle on yourself. In yoga there is a simple rule: do not cause harm to others, do not cause harm to yourself. By doing this you are not acting in love to others or to yourself. We must remember here again, that our lives purpose is to love.

Then there is us and the love that we have fallen upon—our unique song.

Our love is a declaration of our souls. Our love is not what we have to offer each other, it is not our skills or talents. What brought us together is beyond all forms of ego—it is our desire to cultivate our love within one another.

Much like a seed that we have planted within each others hearts, we must take special care to give this seedling the proper attention and nurturing to allow it to grow. We must realize the more vulnerable we are, the closer to love we are and therefore must be gentle to each others’ hearts.

While our paths have come together have both been on separate journeys and therefore at this point we may not see eye to eye. But remember that behind the ego that we both disguise ourselves with is a being of pure love. The more we act on this love, nourish this seed of love, the closer to unity we become. I believe that at a fundamental level, through loving you I am showing my devotion to Universe. I am showing my gratitude for my existence. I am creating what we were created from. Our love is creation. Each day with each word, touch, motion, thought – we are creating love. So I ask you—how are we tending to that seed? Do we we give it the proper nurturing? Will our flower bloom into pure beauty? We must be careful with our words and actions if we wish to continue this sacred bond.

I am so grateful for our chance meeting. It is incredible the power that one person can have over someone’s entire life. I have learned that among many other valuable lessons since the day you walked up behind me.

It is beautiful to watch two universes collide and I am humbled by the opportunity to share this dance with you. I hope that you value these words. I hope that I am projecting myself in a way that rings to your vibration.

I pose these thoughts only as a mirror for you to stand in front of, as I have done myself.

I have so much respect for the power that you hold within. I honor your being. I love you.

BE MY VALENTINE, WORLD

Love is not a feeling.
If love were a feeling,
it would come and go,
like in a great drama.

Love is not a thought.
If love were a thought,
it would have an opposite.
Love is too huge to be contained in thought.

Love is not a belief.
If love were a belief,
you would doubt it.
And who would believe that?

Love is not a state.
If love were a state,
you could enter or leave it.
Or fall out of it. 

Love is not an experience.
If love were an experience,
it would begin and end,
and you would long for its return.

Love is not something you find.
If love were something you found,
you could lose it too,
so you'd have to cling to it for dear life.

Love is simpler, kinder, closer, less dramatic.
Less urgent, more present.
Love is the space in which everything appears.
Every thought, every sensation,
every feeling, pleasurable and painful,
blissful, boring, erotic, gentle and intense,
all are held in love's vast embrace.

Yes, YOU are the space for it all,
spaciously intimate with every breath,
in love with every beat of the heart,
every sound, every smell,
every sensation in the body,
every moment of life.

Feeling like you're in love
or not feeling like you're in love,either way, you are in love
with the bliss and the boredom of existence,
with the certainty and the doubt of it,
with the pleasure and the pain,
with the success and the failure,
with the seeking and the resting,
with every sacred movement
of this astonishing dream-world.

All that can be held, can be lost.
All that you can gain, can be taken away.
All that you can build up, can turn to dust overnight.
All that can be created, can also be destroyed.

Only love remains. Only love.
Not a feeling, not a thought, not a belief,
not a state, not an experience,
not something that you 'have',
not something that you're 'in' or 'out' of,
not something that you 'get' from others
(despite the romantic myths we are sold),
but the endless embrace of all of this.

Love is you. You, before you were named,
before you were even born.
You. You are the One.
The One you have always sought.

The unsilenceable call of the heart.
The cry from deep within.
The fragile silence in the middle of the night.
You will never abandon yourself again.

Be my Valentine, world.

To my sweet wild woman~ Kate Rose

I know why it hasn’t worked out with anyone else.....
you don’t need a man, but a goddamn warrior.
You are the strength of Turkish coffee at sunrise darlin’ and don’t try to pretend that you’re not.
You are one of the wild ones, and no matter how you tried to hide that fact, you can’t be anything other than what you are,......and that’s okay.
You are just as you are supposed to be, magnificently wild in all of your chaotic beauty.
I know you’ve had your heart broken and I know that you don’t understand why it always seems to never work out, but I’ve finally figured it out:
You don’t need a man, you need a goddamn warrior.
It doesn’t matter if this warrior drives a Jeep or a shiny sports car, and it won’t matter if he wears silk or cotton it will not even matter if he works in a high-rise, or on the night shift.
What is going to matter is that when it comes to taking bets on your heart, he is going to be high stakes all the way.
This warrior of yours will crave your strength, and your intensity.
He’s going to look at you and not see something to tame, but something to just fuckin’ admire.
This warrior of yours won’t be someone that you can manipulate or play with as you have in the past, so honey, don’t even try, and trust me, you’re going to love him even more because of it.
Because you aren’t just a woman, you’re a goddamn goddess.
Your fierceness is going to bring him to his knees every single time he looks into your gorgeous eyes, but the difference is, unlike the others, he isn’t going to be scared off.
No, this time, you will have finally met your match because a simple man for you just won’t do.
You need someone to match the fire in your eyes with his own.
Not only that, my little wild thing, but this warrior of yours is going to want to encourage the flames instead of trying to douse them with his own insecurities.
Because for you, a warrior is the only man who will ever live in the wild with you.
He may not have to slay any dragons to earn your love, but he would still walk through fire if it meant seeing that amazing smile that you hold in reserve for only him.
This is the thing, free spirit, this warrior you seek….he’s seeking you too.
For he’s had failed relationships that have left him wondering if maybe he was meant to be alone for the rest of his journey and you’re going to change all of that for him.
You both have been traveling along on your separate journeys and have been doing an okay job at it, but that about to change too.
Because baby, when you and this warrior of yours meet and collide, it’s going to be a love set on fire.
Don’t try to run this time
I know your heart has been broken before, and that you’re not used to things working out, but this time it’s different.
Give yourself time to see that.
This warrior of yours needs to see that it’s possible for someone to see all of his wild, and still be there when he craves his freedom and ventures off into this world for a bit.
You won’t always need to follow him, just as he won’t always follow you.
Let yourself stay wild, even when all you want to do is curl up in that spot along his side and forget the rest of the world exists.
Let yourself still wander naked under the full moon, and drink moonshine with the stars.
Let yourself feel the pull of the wind on your heart, and the sun toward a new journey.
Because this warrior is going to love you because of your wild and he’ll want you to keep it.
You’ll be in this together now,
this amazing, crazy, chaotic, wonderfully heartbreaking life, because it takes a warrior to love a goddess.
And it takes a goddess to show a warrior what real love is.
So pack up your insecurities and your ideas about picket fences, because that was never you anyway. You were born knowing that you were destined for more, and now is the time for you to see what all those dreams look like.
There is no stopping a love like this, so promise me you’ll hold out just a little bit longer.
Have a little bit of hope, and always give love just one more try, because I promise you my sweet wild woman......
the love that you seek is seeking you as well.

Unending Love...Rabindranath Tagore

I seem to have loved you in numberless forms, numberless times…
In life after life, in age after age, forever.
My spellbound heart has made and remade the necklace of songs,
That you take as a gift, wear round your neck in your many forms,
In life after life, in age after age, forever.

Whenever I hear old chronicles of love, its age-old pain,
Its ancient tale of being apart or together.
As I stare on and on into the past, in the end you emerge,
Clad in the light of a pole-star piercing the darkness of time:
You become an image of what is remembered forever.

You and I have floated here on the stream that brings from the fount.
At the heart of time, love of one for another.
We have played along side millions of lovers, shared in the same
Shy sweetness of meeting, the same distressful tears of farewell-
Old love but in shapes that renew and renew forever.

Today it is heaped at your feet, it has found its end in you
The love of all man’s days both past and forever:
Universal joy, universal sorrow, universal life.
The memories of all loves merging with this one love of ours –
And the songs of every poet past and forever.