She

For the love of a tree..
She went out on a limb.
For the love of the sea..
She rocked the boat.
For the love of the earth..
She dug deeper.
For the love of community..
She mended fences.
For the love of the stars..
She let her light shine.
For the love of spirit..
She nurtured her soul.
For the love of a good time..
She sowed seeds of happiness.
For the love of the Goddess..
She drew down the moon.
For the love of nature..
She made compost.
For the love of a good meal..
She gave thanks.
For the love of family..
She reconciled differences.
For the love of creativity..
She entertained new possibilities.
For the love of her enemies..
She suspended judgment.
For the love of herself..
She acknowledged her worth.
And the world was richer for her.

Last night, Maa appeared in my dream...

It must have been the wee hours of morning, the time when the birds start stirring with life... and the sun hangs low, waiting to bring the world to its feet once again. When she came and sat next to me, I felt the mattress dip and I woke up with a start and it was my mother, long gone from this world, looking as radiant and beautiful as ever. She was smiling yet looked anxious. I said "Maa, is everything okay? You hardly ever visit me..." and she stroked my forehead and said "I know the heartbreak you have experienced in the last few months. I am worried and afraid for you."

Tell me, my rabbit (her nickname for me)... tell me about him. I looked at her, lowered my eyes and said softly "Maa I love him. It is as simple and as beautiful as that. I have read about it and we even discussed about love in the books we read. I never thought I'd experience my soul actually be another's half... I thought it happens only in imagination or fiction. But it has happened to me. I love him with all my being, my heart and soul. I would give my life for him in a second, without thought if I just know it needs to be done for his happiness and peace. I see him, not just the handsome, soft yet strong man he appears to be. I see his heart, full of love and gentleness. I see the kindness in him. I see how he always puts others before him and has all his life. I wanted to be someone who puts him first. He is a beautiful and pure heart... and I cherish him. I adore him."

She nodded and said "But, child, he doesn't love you. He does not even know this." I said "I know and it's okay. Love does not want anything except the opportunity to be received, to be given. Anything that craves possession is a factor of our ego, Maa. I just wanted to be his strength, the way he would have been mine. I wanted to hold his hand and journey through life. I wanted to be a smile on his face and a reason for his joy. I wanted to love him and his family and just be grateful to be a part of such a man's life. But, sometimes, no matter how altruistic and pure our thought and intention maybe, life flows in another direction. We just have to accept it. It did feel like for a moment, that he sees me. But I was mistaken. It would have been a reward of many lifetimes to have this dream manifest... maybe I have to be more deserving of a love like this." 

She sighed and said "But have you thought of yourself? Your future?"  I smiled and said "You know me, Maa. I have never been someone who is worried or afraid about the future. I just go from day to day wanting to make the best of whatever comes my way. I have learnt that you cannot second guess or plan life too minutely. And being afraid of a tomorrow that may never come, only robs us of the joy in today which is before us."

She nodded and said "I could never make you worldwise. You were always my crazy little girl with a heart as vast as the sky. I could never make you be afraid of this world. I just wanted you to be happy, my little one. What about marriage? Who will look after you?" 

"Look at me, Maa... see how I shine? See my smile? Where do you think it comes from... a happiness, deeply rooted in my heart. I am blessed to have this heart. People get married, are in relationships are they all happy? Sadly, no. I am so lucky (maybe not in the eyes of this world) to have this love. At least I know the someone I really want is here, is alive. Even from afar, I know someone I TRULY want to pray for. How many people even couples, really love their partners so? They stay together for the sake of society and convention, yet remain unfulfilled in their being. See me, Maa, I am LOVE. I have this love that will sustain me forever. I will see him once in a while and if I see that he is happy and content. I will smile inwardly and sing a song. I will keep on meeting people with an open heart and mind and as for looking after me, see Him. He is my strength, no not the man I love... HIM. My divine father, who now, walks with me with every step. Maa, I trust HIM and believe me, Woh kabhi mera bura nahin hone denge. He knows the reason behind every sorrow and joy. I am now in HIS hands. You need not worry." 

She looked relieved and touched my cheek "Any regrets?"

I said "Well, not exactly regret but sometimes, I do feel sad that I could not even tell him, I really wanted to hold his hands and just tell him that I love him. This emotion sometimes falls from my eyes. It is just love that could not be expressed that flows as tears." 

She then held my close to her bosom and said "Make a wish, Lopa." 

"Maa, my wish is that in anyway, without creating any disturbance or ever being a frown on his face, may my love be his strength just the way it is my courage. And Maa, do this for me just one time, go as a soft breeze and ruffle his hair, caress his cheek, bringing him a moment of sudden relief and calm which he just feels and cannot explain."

She laughed and gently slapped my cheek and said "I will." 

A beautiful poem by Rumi.

I will be waiting here

For the grey sky to cry

For your suspicions to die

For you to really try

I will be waiting here

For the white snow to melt

For the roses to be smelt

For you to feel what I felt

I will be waiting here

For the moments to pass

For the memories to last

For you to break that glass

I will be waiting here

For the ships to sail on the sea

For the clock to strike three

For you to believe in me

I will be waiting here

For your silence to break

For your soul to shake

For your love to wake

~ Rumi

Life IS! You choose what to make of it!

LIFE IN ITSELF IS NOT MEANINGFUL It is meaningful only if you can sing a song of the eternal, if you can release some fragrance of the divine, of the godly, if you can become a lotus flower -- deathless, timeless.

If you can become pure love, if you can beautify this existence, IF YOU CAN BECOME A BLESSING TO THIS EXISTENCE, only then life has significance; otherwise it is pointless. It is like an empty canvas: you can go on carrying it your whole life and you can die under its weight, but what is the point? PAINT SOMETHING ON IT!

Meaning has to be created in life; meaning is not given already. You are given freedom, you are given creativity, you are given life. All that is needed to create meaning is given. All the essential ingredients of meaning are given, but meaning is not given, MEANING HAS TO BE CREATED BY YOU. You have to become a creator in your own right.

AND WHEN YOU BECAME A CREATOR in your own right, you participate with God, YOU BECOME A PART OF GOD.

Giving and Receiving Are The Same~

Choose to give something from your heart today. Don’t hold back the Divine urge to express the beauty of who you are: the reason you are here on Earth is to give of yourself unconditionally.
Your ego will try to convince you that you should hoard and retain your Light because it is finite and will dry up if you give it all away. You’ll be ‘done over’, 'cheated’ or 'ripped off’ if you are generous and extend your energy to others without thought of what you will get out of it - this is what the ego tells you.

In Spiritual Truth, this is an erroneous concept because Spirit says, “As you give, so you shall receive.” This means that the quality of your giving is mirrored exactly by how you then receive. If you are stingy, miserly and judgemental about how and what you give, you’ll find that you are on the receiving end of this energetic and emotional statement, too.

If you want to receive more, give more first. Those people who seem to receive a lot (not just monetarily, but emotionally, spiritually, energetically) usually have extended their energy outwards in a confident, generous and magnanimous fashion. This isn’t the same as just 'having a lot of money’, because some people have money but are not rich or abundant in their life force energy. They hoard and are stingy with their money even though they have a fair amount. This doesn’t bring them joy or spiritual contentment because they are not in the flow of their heart, and their money isn’t doing good in the world - it’s not circulating and bringing Light.

Your giving is always noticed by the Universe, and the universal Law of Giving and Receiving compensates accordingly without deviation. If you want to live a more abundant life in any sense, give abundantly of your love (which means your kindness, time, skills, gifts, energy) and it will create a force-field around you that magnetises what you have given back to you.

When you Love Someone you Can’t be With.

Each day I wake, having told myself I would not…that I would not hold on.

That I would let go of you—that when I wake, I’ll have let you go.

But this morning, like many mornings, I’ve awoken to the delicate whisper of your soul yet again.

I think, “D*mn it, I’m still in love with him,” relating to how I feel about someone so strongly despite the many feeble efforts I make each day to detach, let go and love without expectation. The moment he crosses my mind, it’s all over. The first glimpse of him each time and I’m falling again—falling for him all over again. He mesmerizes me.

This man who haunts my thoughts, desires and dreams—I can’t help the way I feel about him, and so often I’ve tried to discount these feelings and rationalize this behavior as love-lust or an infatuation, ignoring what’s real and passing through me in the present moment.

I’m cultivating love, and each day our lesson is to acknowledge it while giving it to the divine for transmutation and expression. In this case I cannot reach out to him and simply say, “I love you, I’m in love with you.” And sometimes that just burns me up is the need the bone deep need to just hold him tight and say that even if it is for a moment... let my heart empty itself of the love it carries around with his name on it. 

What am I to do about this very real, nagging feeling that occupies my mind, body, heart and spirit so often? We suck it up—remembering to love ourselves first and foremost because needing someone this way reminds us of how much we need ourselves too; that self-love cannot be relied upon from others for our own personal satisfaction and fulfillment.

Sometimes we simply need to be there, holding space—not making sense of it or trying to examine things too closely. Sometimes our heart simply wants us to stay put and to be there if or when someone needs us. Even if we’re thousands of miles apart, we can be there for them—in spirit.We need only think of them for a few moments, realize how blessed we are to know them and that our lives intertwine and separate for many mysterious reasons, of which we really have no genuine comprehension of.
It’s a miracle to even know someone on such a soul-deep level.

What are we to do when someone else’s heart drifts elsewhere?

We honor their space and respect their commitments while remaining steadfast to our own.

The man I imagine loving would do it for me, so I will do the same for him.

Sometimes the cultivation of love is meant to gestate over long distances and periods of time.

We can simply smile kindly upon this person we hold so dear to our hearts and whisper how happy we are for them into the wind.

I’ll even whisper, “I love you.”

Because I care—for reasons that cannot be explained. Because I just love him and that too cannot be explained.

The Embrace of Love

We hold each other. 
❤️ 
In allowing myself to be vulnerable, I awaken your stregnth and in absorbing your stregnth, I find my rest.
❤️ 
And suddenly life brings me back to appreciating the simple, the tender and the kind in you, my love. 
❤️ 
Suddenly my body and soul find home in your sincere hug, like a breath of fresh air, like sunlight warming my heart to my very toes. 
❤️
To be lost in those eyes, open and unafraid, windows to life and love and desire.
❤️
An unexpected caress, full of intent and appreciation for the seconds of skin connecting, so much more than skin.
❤️
Everything can be ok, in this embrace, I feel time stand still, and all the worries of the day simply breaking to bits.
❤️
And all I got for you is me, my sincere self, and I show you how much I care, how much you mean to me.
❤️
And in silence, we go back to basics, to tenderness, to simple and ever powerful Love.

TRAUMA

is the invisible force that keeps us running, restless, in pursuit of some intangible goal.
Caught up in some unnecessary activity.
Addiction. Compulsions.
Makes us escape into thinking.
Makes the body feel unsafe.
Makes the present moment into an enemy.

If we slow down. If we stop.
If we rest. If we simply do nothing.
Then we will have to face ... ourselves.
We will have to face buried feelings.
All the sh*t we were running from.
All the darkness. The gunk. The muck.
The loneliness. The boredom. The emptiness.

Trauma says “run!”.
Trauma says “stillness is dangerous!”.
Trauma says “Do Not Rest!”.

We have to start by proving to ourselves that it is safe to rest! Safe to be still. Safe to do nothing, just for a moment. Safe to think our thoughts and feel our feelings ...

... and not ‘fix’ the moment.

We can begin - one moment at a time - to digest all the undigested things inside. Stay with sadness for a moment longer. Be present with our joy. Breathe into our anxiety instead of running from it. Become curious about our discomfort instead of distracting ourselves with (unnecessary food, drink, cleaning, drugs, sex, shopping, Internet, thinking, talking, yoga, seeking, rumination, spiritual practice...)

We can begin to challenge the core story at the heart of trauma: That the present moment is unsafe. That the body is against us. That feelings are dangerous.

That stillness equals death and destruction.

That we have to ‘do’ something in order to be worthy, and loved, and safe, and whole.

It takes courage to stop running.
It takes courage to lean into the storm.
It takes courage to touch the darkness inside with the infinite light of our curious attention.

It takes courage to break the addiction to future.

And be here now.

And breathe.

And not know.

Seek to understand, for with understanding comes acceptance, peace, and – in many instances – love. We cannot hate what we understand.

Remove the ego. Everyone you meet, every person who makes you smile, dance, cringe, swear, and scream, each one is simply trying to get through the day the best way she knows how. Each is striving to become the person he wants to be. Each is working to live the life she wants to live. Whatever pain anyone in your life may cause you, remember this: It isn’t personal. It is simply a product of that person moving through his life in the best way he can right now.

Forgive easily. Even if the other person doesn’t ask for it, want it, or accept that forgiveness may be needed. (This extends to your past selves as well.) Forgive for others, but most importantly forgive for yourself. Anger, resentment, distrust, jealously – these are all negative emotions that hurt only the person carrying them. Do not let that person be you.

Embrace boundaries – your own and others’. Boundaries are what keep us healthy and engaged with each other. They ensure we invest enough in ourselves to have plenty left over to invest in the people we choose. They help guide us in reserving our energies for people and projects that reward, inspire, and encourage us. They keep romantic relationships alive by helping each partner retain his or her individuality – that spark of self that attracted their mates in the first place.

Be who you are. We are all flawed; this is part of our brilliance. Love your flaws. You are the only you that has ever been, the only you that ever will be. You have unique gifts to offer the people you meet and the world in which you live, and these gifts are inherently tied to your individual perspective.

Regret nothing. Each moment of your life – each choice you have made and experience you have encountered – has shaped you into the person you are, right now. If you don’t like where you are or who you are, work on loving yourself harder and creating the version of yourself and life you want. If you’re happy, be grateful and know that everything in your life happened exactly as it was meant to happen.

Pay attention to how things make you feel. At its essence, life is a subjective experience. It doesn’t matter what you have, who you’re with, what you look like, how much money you make, or what you do for a living, if you’re not getting positive emotions from those things, people, and events.

Recognize that time is your most precious commodity. None of us knows how many years, months, days, hours, or minutes we get. Make the most of each one. At the end of your life, if you’re granted a final moment to say good-bye, it will be time – not money, status, fame, or belongings – that you’ll appreciate most. Do the things that bring you joy now.

Time.

We often perceive that there is so much of it for most of our lives, but the reality is that time is always running out on us. And we have no idea when our personal time will be gone.

That's why there is no time to wait to embrace love, to follow our hearts, to learn to listen to our soul's deepest callings, and follow the spiritual path. There may not be time for it in 10 years or even 10 minutes.

With life being as precious as it is, avoid the trap of delaying what matters to you, and go towards your truth today.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Saying, "No," to what you want.

It's a sad truth that many people will say, "No," to the very thing, person, situation, or something else that they want. Right at the cusp of attaining a heart's true desire, the ego wrecks the party. And the person says, "No," to the new deep love connection. The person says, "No," to the dream job. The person says, "No," to the vacation they've always wanted. People say, "No," in a myriad of ways.

But the answer here is not just to say, "Yes." The answer is to understand the ego. The answer is to go towards the part of you saying, "No," and to look at the fears and attachments that created that response. That is where your spiritual work is, and if you do it, then the next time something that truly matters to you arises, saying, "Yes," is effortless.

What you seek, seeks you too! Your thirst for Him is His thirst for you!

Longing itself is Divine.

Longing for worldly things makes you inert.

Longing for infinity fills you with life.

When longing dies, inertia sets in. But longing also brings a sense of pain.

To avoid the pain, you try to push away the longing. The skill is to bear the pain of longing and move on. Do not try to find a shortcut to overcome longing. Do not make the longing short – that’s why it is called loooonging. True longing in itself brings up moments of bliss. That is why in ancient days longing was kept alive by singing and listening to kathas, or stories. When longing transcends relationships, then judgments, jealousy and all negative feelings drop. It is only with wisdom and self-knowledge that you can transcend relationships. People often think wisdom is devoid of longing – no! Such wisdom is dry. The longing that comes with true wisdom makes life juicier.

The Divine is certainly juicy! Longing gives you the power to bless. Bless the entire creation for the longing in you is God. 

Fall madly, completely, utterly in love... never fear the dynamics of bliss that flow through you... dont close yourself, don't hide behind denial, be balanced and conscientious, be honest and be motivated with the intention to bring joy to others, your light shines in the world... never be afraid to nourish with your love... smile, rejoice, dance with Him... let your celebration of all that Is heal the world!

YOU ARE NEVER FAR FROM HEALING

You are never far from healing,
for healing is not a destination.
It is more like a remembering;
a constant invitation.

It is like the Sun; always there,
yet sometimes hidden
by innocent clouds.
When you feel far from healing,
when doubt rages, and sorrow fills your being,
and pain stings and burns;
when yesterday's joys seem so far away,
and tomorrow's happiness is a distant fantasy;
when you feel like you're living the wrong life,
and nothing seems possible,
stop, just for a moment.
Bring your attention out of past and future.
Invite curiosity into the moment.
Into the body, the breath.
This living scene. This day, this hour.
What's it like to be alive, just for a moment?
Can you feel your feet on the earth?
Can you feel your belly rise and fall?
What if you're not far from healing?
What if you're not actually broken?
What if healing IS presence?
This timeless sense of being alive?
What if the future is unknown, and your fears are all in your mind?
What if the Sun never stops shining,
even as the storm rages?

I’d like to lie with you
and for each time we undress to marvel at the newness
of each other’s skin
To be the lovers that drink up love
Like they’re starving
Tasting stars and drinking moonlight
I’d like to kiss you when the moon is full, or new or a quarter
It doesn’t really matter
I just want those lips
I’d like for it to rain
And listen to the tink tink
As I count stars
Or for it to not rain and be sunny
I’d like to hold you,
Not because I’m cold
But because I want to lie beside you
I’d like to love you when the sun comes up
To bathe in our light
To drink coffee tangled in a messy joyous heap
I’d like to make raspberries on your back and tickle you till you shove me off the bed
I’d like to start the day laughing
And I’d like to make love to you
Right there
On the floor
For my sole intent is to drink your existence.

Being Single Is Better Than Being With Someone Whose Soul Doesn’t Match Yours

It is okay to wait for the right person for you. There is nothing wrong with being single. Actually, it is one of the best things that you can do for yourself. You become stronger and stronger because you are responsible for every aspect of your life... there is no pressure on another to complete you or to make you happy. 

When you are in a relationship out of loneliness or boredom, or pressure from the world, please know that you are wasting precious time. Yours and the other person's... when you "settle down" with someone who doesn't make your heart sing and your soul soar... you block the potential for true love not just for yourself but for the other person as well.

Real love does not come easy and often. You can’t transform a mediocre relationship into a soulmate connection. You may settle down into a bland, mundane routine which is comforting to your need to be with someone but you remain thirsty for true connection and soul deep intimacy. 

You should be really careful with your emotions. Don’t waste them on people that you know you don’t belong with. Don’t open your heart to someone who will never appreciate its greatness or see you for the awesome amazing being that you are.

Sometimes even the mere idea of being in a relationship can be so strong and alluring that we end up with someone who we know is the wrong person for us, but we decide to give them a chance because we want to be in a relationship.

We should all take a moment and reflect on our lives and our decisions. Being single is an amazing thing. You can do so many things that can fulfill you even more than a relationship with someone whose soul is not vibrating on the same level as yours.

Stay single until you find someone whose soul matches yours. It is hard to retain the belief in true love but just have faith that if it burns in your heart... it burns in someone else's heart as well. And when you touch your heart and feel the bliss of love, you will never be truly satisfied with anything less.

Bless the world... by being a blessing

The spark in your eyes
The smile in your face
The tone of your voice
The touch of your hand
The way you walk
The way you talk
The way you love to love
The way you sing and dance
The way you make romance
The way you roar and soar
The way you laugh at pain and misery
The way you solve all mysteries
The way you discover your inner self
The way you shine your inner light
The way you show the way when all is lost
The way you arrive with all you got
And offer everyone your higher thoughts
The way you offer gratitude
for all to see and hear
The way you are sincere honest decent
authentic for real Genuine and true
Yes it is a blessing to be a blessing...

The wound is the place where the light enters

you said Rumi.

The cause of the wound be it divorce, disease or the death of a loved one is also the moment where you have a choice.
To feel sorry for your self, to feel like a victim, to live in the darkness.

Or......embrace life, see your wound as a chance to make changes, be positive and start and see this beautiful world through new eyes. Surround your self in the light.

Layer by layer start shedding your conditioning and beliefs imposed by culture and other people.

As you break your self open becoming vulnerable, more and more light flows in.

Delve in to your deepest sub conscious release, release, release.

Feel the old emotions,
You no longer need them,
Give them a hug then let them float away. This space is needed for the bliss, the joy, the light.

Feel the light take you by the hand and guide you.

It will take you to places where happiness brings tears to your eyes. Where love engulf's you and never lets you go.

Listen, feel, see.

The light is all around you.

It always was.

It was just waiting for the wound so it could enter you.

The light now shines from you

You are the light~

Whispers of a broken heart... which loves and loves and loves!! Always!!

True love is what it means to break against one another,

To shatter into pieces that fit together.

Love is the surrender of safety in the arms of a lover,
And to fear not being broken forever.

Love is the sweet pain that you feel when they are near,

It is the entirety of your words that shed a smiling tear.

Love is the sweeping flight of birds in the sky,

It is the knowing you see when you gaze in their eyes.

Love is the reflection of your self in the mirror,

It is the acceptance of beauty in the flaws that you fear.

True love speaks from the soul and not from the heart,

It knows that two can be one even when they are apart.

Every act of love raises the vibration of all the energy in the universe. And making love is a wonderful way to raise your own. When you are truly with another person and their body and soul, when you dont think of being physical only as a means to "relax" or a be used at the end of a day as a sleeping pill, when you love someone so much that you just want to give them so much pleasure, when you realise just how healing, empowering and humbling touch is, when you realise that it is your emotional and mental frequency that raises sex to another realm, when you truly absorb the idea of making love. When you allow yourself to be this vulnerable to your own emotions, when you know you dont need to fear your desires or needs because if born out of true intention, they will never lead you astray, when you embrace your sensuality and know just how important discernment is when choosing who to allow into your lives... when you realise this you will love making love and will be able to balance your desires. You may go without sex for years because you know its anything but casual. Sex is a part of your spiritual life, it is sacred. Sex is not obscene, not pornographic, not to be condemned, not to be repressed, but immensely respected, because we are born out of it. It is the energy and dance of creation.

I LOVE YOU!

I love you.
It's not a weight you must carry around.
I love you.
It's not a box that holds you in.
I love you.
It's not a standard you have to bear.
I love you.
It's not a sacrifice I make.
I love you.
It's not a pedestal you are frozen upon.
I love you.
It's not an expectation of perfection.
I love you.
It's not my life's whole purpose (or yours).
I love you.
It's not to make you change.
I love you.
It's not even to make you love me.
I love you.
It's as pure and simple as that.

I LOVE YOU!

Mind lives on more. Misery starts with "more and more". Misery makes you dense and gross. Self is subtle. To go from gross to subtle you go through the finest relative... the atom. To overcome aversion, hatred, jealousy, attraction or entanglements, you have to go to the atom. Going to the atom means accepting a teeny tiny bit of all this.

It may be difficult to accept something that you don't like but you can definitely accept a teeny tiny bit (an atom) of it. The moment you accept that one atom, you will see change happen. This has to be done in a meditative state. Suppose you love someone. You want more and more of them. Yet there is no fulfilment. In Anu Vrat (the vow of an atom), you take just one atom of that person and that is enough to bring fulfilment to you.

Though the river is vast, a little sip quenches your thirst. Though Earth has so much food, just a little bite satisfies your hunger. All that you need is teeny tiny bits. Accept a teeny tiny bit of everything in life, that will bring you fulfilment.

"KATRA MILA JO TERE DARR PER SE MERE MAALIK"